There Once was a Man from Verona...

  I wrote this limerick (my first - and probably last) for the St. Patrick's Day contest on a local radio station. It didn't win, but that's just as well; The Mad Limerickeer just doesn't have the same ring as The Mad Sonneteer.

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There once was a man from Verona,
Whose wife was a bit of a stonah.
He caught her in bed
With a dealer named Ted,
And, now he lives all alonah.

Stand

By Bud Koenemund

A 100 Word Story

  Even as the fighting ended, peace still seemed like an ethereal dream; something that would slip through your fingers like cigarette smoke. The silence was surreal. The sound of gunfire and explosions, aircraft and dying men faded, replaced by…nothing; not even wind blowing across a wrecked landscape.

  Five minutes ago, they'd been at war – now they weren't. They’d run hunched over; sat huddled in bunkers; crouched in foxholes; ducked, crawled, and dove.

  For the first time he could remember, he stood up; stretching to his full height. He'd been a soldier all his adult life.

  “Now what?” he asked.

Hell

One Step Back

A Haiku for Inauguration Day 2017
By Bud Koenemund

Inspired by Catherine Harren Barufaldi

One step back, is all;
The world only spins forward
because love trumps hate!

Never Forget Rule One!

By Bud Koenemund


The Poet's Handbook

Section 1: Rules and Regulations

Sub-section A: Love Poetry

Rule One – Unrequited and/or Unobtainable Love: The Poet shall at no time compose any passage for an obtainable love, or for any person that requites the Poet’s love.  The Poet will limit creative efforts to writing for the following: persons married to another, persons engaged to another, persons promised to another, or persons otherwise involved with another.  See also: Courtly Love.

Mr. C Makes an Unwelcome Return - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

Mr. C Makes an Unwelcome Return

For Mom

My Mom found a lump.

Not a statistic…my Mom.

And, the whole world stopped.

Muse Rejoined - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

Muse Rejoined

For TK

Would'st thou write for me?

Confess thy heart, and make me
a muse to a muse.

An Uncomfortable Question - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

An Uncomfortable Question

Would it be creepy

if I confess that I've cum

while thinking of you?

Where There's Smoke... - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

Where There's Smoke...

Many muses spark

my words. Requite my love, and

you'll ignite my heart.

Seasons - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

Seasons

For TK

My heart and mind war;

despairing that sweetest spring
can't postpone my fall.

Language Lessons - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

Language Lessons

My tongue drips with words

I long to leave on your skin
in the prose of lust.

Satisfied - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

Satisfied

Control my raw lust;

taming while devouring;

'til you've had your fill.

Thirst - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

Thirst

Concupiscence burns

hot, a thirst begging to be

quenched by your body.

Internet - A Haiku for NaPoWriMo

By Bud Koenemund

Internet

Everyone is

standing in a room screaming,
while looking at porn.

Star Stuff

By Bud Koenemund

Star Stuff

For "Her."

Consumed by madness;

hysterical and empty,
I drift amongst stars.

Colors

By Bud Koenemund

Colors

For Isabella Pontanares

Blue lust doth compel.

Red fire will consume. Combined?

Purple passion rules.

Any Muse in a Storm?

By Bud Koenemund

Any Muse in a Storm?

For Kitty Boyce

If thou think'st I

offer my heart to each muse,
thou art mistaken.

A Haiku, for the Start of National Poetry Writing Month

By Bud Koenemund

The Better Part of Valor

For Chelsea Cohen

Often, the plain truth

is best left unspoken; it

only causes pain.

Shakespeare the Critic

Hmmm, great indeed! "So we beat on..."

I thought this was about last night's wine-fest! Oh, my poor head!

This dude scares the $#!^ outta me! Ed, let's go get a drink and talk about it!

Well, maybe not the complete plays. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)

This one writes pretty well...for a chick!

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was an age of wisdom, it was..."

 Blah, blah, blah!

Seriously, John?! As they say (or, will say in the future), less is more!

 Have you thought about trying a sonnet? Come on, 14 lines...

The Commandments of Will

So, I've been digging through The Bible, and I've discovered several more of God's commandments meant to be obeyed without question or interpretation:

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The Commandments of Will
(Researched and collected by The Mad Sonneteer)

1. The Word of Will is eternal and unchanging. To question His authorship shall be heresy. (Lev. 28: 13-14)

2. Thou shalt not take the name of Will in vain. (Deut. 35: 17)

3. Thou shalt remember the sonnets and keep them holy. (Ex. 41: 7)

4. Thou shalt not worship Oxford as I have commanded thee worship Will. (Lev. 28: 24)

5. Thou shalt smite Oxfordians with the Word of Will that they might repent their sin. (Deut. 35: 33)

6. Thou shalt not lie with an Oxfordian as with a Stratfordian. (Lev. 28: 69)

7. The Oxfordian lifestyle shall be considered an abomination, and the blasphemous shall burn in the eternal fires of summer-session Remedial English classes. (Lev. 28: 10-11)

8. Thou shalt not suffer Russell Brand to portray any character of Will. (Prov. 32: 67)