The Media is Not Alone to Blame

By Bud Koenemund

  Sure, it would be nice if the media would, as Bill Maher urges, "calm down." But, you have to remember the "frenzy" is what many platforms – across the political spectrum – live for. They want the craziness, and the violence, and the disasters, and the pandemics (Hello; H1N1, Ebola, SARS, etc.), because it equals ratings. They need eyeballs glued to televisions, or newspapers, or computer screens in order to make money.

  The panel shows found on many cable news channels are much the same. They'll tell you what happened, or what might happen, then turn to a group of "pundits," to tell you what to think about it. And, it's usually only a matter of time until one of these people makes some outlandish statement or prediction meant to stir up the masses – the truth be damned. This is, of course, meant to ensure viewers will tune in to see what they'll say tomorrow.

  Instead of – or perhaps, in addition to – the media changing how they do what they do, I'd prefer we foster more people who have been taught to think for themselves; who can take in information, process it, and come to their own rational conclusions.

  Sadly, in this day and age of constantly shrinking education budgets, and growing – misguided – anti-intellectual attitudes, I don't see that happening any time soon. Once again, as Pogo warns: "We have met the enemy, and he is us."

Big Lies and Big Brother

By Bud Koenemund

  It's brilliant actually. The mainstream media tries to do their job; calling out lies, illustrating potential conflicts of interest, and exposing the past of his nominees. But he declares it "fake news," even while demanding the press do their job. Regrettably, the ignorant and The Deplorables blindly accept -- even rabidly parrot -- this.
  The only official news has become that spouted by Big Brother. The only truth is the "truth" from Big Brother. He threatens that contradiction will be punished. "Alternative facts" quickly become the norm. We are to pay no attention to what was said last week; the "truth" is what they say now. It is true, and has always been true.
  Joseph Goebbels would be proud, and George Orwell would be impressed.

Pakistani Intelligence Finds Waldo

Disassociated Press
6 July 2011

ISLAMABAD – In a stunning announcement, Pakistan’s Directorate for Inter-Services Intelligence (ISI) today announced that it has found Waldo.

The bespectacled cartoon explorer, on the run since 1987, was tracked down at a beach party near Karachi, by a special team of analysts formed after Osama bin Laden was killed by American forces in May.

“From now on, when the children of the world want to know where Waldo is, you can tell them he’s in a Pakistani prison, and that’s where he’s going to stay,” said Lieutenant General Ahmad Shuja Pasha, Director of ISI.

“We put our best and brightest on this search,” said Pasha. “And, they did not fail us.”

Although few details about the actual capture were released, Pasha displayed several still photographs he claims show a Pakistani special forces team raiding a “Sweet 16” party being held on the beach at Hawke’s Bay.

Several members of the media attempted, unsuccessfully, to locate Waldo amongst the crowd of partygoers in the photographs, and questioned his actual presence.

“He was there, and now we have him,” Pasha assured the media.

Pasha stated that more raids could occur soon.

“We’re currently conducting follow-up operations using actionable intelligence obtained from Waldo,” said Pasha. “We are confident that other characters – such as Calvin and Hobbes, and Godot – who are being hunted around the world will soon be located and taken into custody.”

Pasha denied American involvement in the capture of Waldo.

“Absolutely not,” he said, when asked about U.S. assistance.

“In fact, it is because the Americans were finally off our backs about Osama that we were able to find Waldo,” he said. “We had so many assets focused on Osama – running here, there, and everywhere for the Americans – that this dangerous criminal continually slipped through our fingers.”

None of the team members responsible for the capture spoke with the media, but one ISI official, who identified himself only as “Peggy,” did.

“Truthfully, this was much more difficult than [finding] bin Laden,” “Peggy” said. “Bin Laden was staying in one place. Waldo was constantly on the move, hiding in large groups of people, in countries around the world.”

“Seriously, he was hiding right down the street from a military academy. Who would’ve guessed that?” he asked members of the media.

“Peggy” hinted that many in the ISI feel like they have been vindicated for what some in the west see as their agency’s long-term failure in the hunt for bin Laden.

“Did the CIA find Waldo? Did MI5? Did Russia’s FSB?” “Peggy” demanded. “No! ISI found him and will bring him to justice.”

Though never formally indicted for any crimes in the western world, Waldo has been accused of countless cross border incursions, after popping up in dozens of countries, apparently without passing through customs inspections.